I Survived Halloween

I sit here looking at the two huge mounds of Hallween candy on my family room floor from my girl's trick-or-treat bags. I just counted up all my points for the evening and thought I'd done well - and then I remember the four beers that I drank tonight. Oops. That added eight points. When all is said and done, I didn't do too bad today - only went over my daily allotment by 5. And since I weighed in today, my weekly points went back to 35, so I had those to work with.

When I was looking for points info to figure out the candy I ate, I found this great site that listed a lot of Halloween candy and their points values. I had eaten two pieces - a Reese's Peanut Cup (2 points) and a package of milk duds (1 point). Not bad considering how much candy is sitting here in front of me.

I mentioned I weighed in today - with a loss of 1.8 pounds. That makes my total on WW 8.4 pounds and my grand total of almost 14 pounds. Go me! My point allotment went down by one point today. Hopefully that won't make much of a difference.

Now I just need to get through the weekend. We are going to a Halloween party tomorrow evening and hopefully there will be some good food for me to eat there. I usually send most of the candy to work with my husband and that won't happen until Monday, so I have to get through 2 more days.

My Kettle Bell Kicked My Ass

I was feeling very motivated yesterday during preschool time, which is pretty much the only daytime alone time I get all week. I thought about taking a walk or going to the gym in my community. Instead, I thought I'd workout with my kettle bell.

I can't remember when I bought the kettle bell. I think it was early in the spring, so at least six months ago. I had been watching a marathon of the British version of The Biggest Loser and the trainer used kettle bells for the workout. I ran right out and bought one - and it's been sitting in the box in the corner of my family room every since.

So yesterday I decided to try the kettle bell. It came with a DVD, so I popped it into the DVD player and got ready for my workout. The DVD ended up just showing you how to do the exercises. I did them. No big deal. I had bought a pretty light kettle bell - "only" 10 pounds. The nice lady on the DVD (with the very skinny body and huge muscles) talked about how your lower back shouldn't be hurting if you are doing the exercises right. My lower back did not hurt. I did lots of squats with the kettle bell. Okay... a fit person wouldn't consider it a lot, but for me, 20 is a lot.

Last night, my legs hurt a bit. I took a long, hot bath and felt pretty good. This morning, though, my legs and back are killing me. I'm sitting with the heating pad on my back as I type this. I'm probably going to have to go take another hot bath. I'm pretty sure the kettle bell was used as a torture device back in the middle ages.

But... I did walk/run on the treadmill this morning. I did some stretches and do feel a little better since I exercised. And you read it right... I ran. I walked for 3 minutes, then ran for one minute. I know it's not much, but it's a big deal for me. I hope to be able to start running on a more regular basis. My husband has been running regularly for a couple of months and has lost quite a bit of weight. I'd like to lose 10-20 more pounds, though, before I run outside where people can see me.

How Much Can You Blame on Your Parents

I'm not one to think about how much my childhood or my parents screwed up my life. I had a pretty good childhood and I have lots of fun memories from those years. When people blame their childhood for their adult problems, I think they should pretty much get over it. Of course, there are definitely circumstances where your childhood can screw you up, but I'd like to think that most people had pretty good childhoods.

Anyway... where I am going with this. My parents. My parents are both overweight. Not morbidly obese, but overweight nonetheless. And on top of that, they have some health conditions that are not helped because of being overweight. They both have high blood pressure and cholesterol issues. And my dad has adult onset diabetes. My dad definitely does not take care of himself. He's had a heart attack because of his diabetes and still that didn't change the way he treats his body. He sneaks food. And that amazes me, that a man in his mid-60's would sneak food. So much so that I try to hide any candy or cookies I have in my house when he comes over.

I want my girls to see me change the way I eat and take care of my body. I don't remember seeing my parents exercise. I do remember them dieting. My dad did the cabbage soup diet and the Richard Simmons Deal-a-Meal. He was able to drop 20 pounds fairly quickly... but would then gain it back, plus more. He's still able to do that, but it takes longer and he gains more back. My mom did Weight Watchers. I also remember her, about a year before she was turning 50, saying she didn't want to go into her 50's being fat. Yet, she did nothing to change it.

So I'm trying to change things. When I look at my parents, I see my future. And as much as I love my parents, that's not the future that I want to live.

Thank Goodness for Points Counting

I have not made the best food choices in the past two days. On Friday, I went to Chick-Fil-A (my favorite fast food place!) for lunch. One sandwich and fry order later, I had eaten way more than half my daily points. But I knew that so I made some good choices for dinner (leftover chicken chili - only 3 points for one cup). Yesterday, I went to a birthday party in the afternoon and ate pizza and cake, then helped with a Haunted House in the evening and had a cookie and some candy.

So in the past two days, I have had zero fruits and veggies. Not the best choices... but I did stay within my points. In the past, I would have eaten way more cookies and candy - as well as whatever was around. So that's progress.

Slow and Steady

I weighed this morning and am down a pound from last week. I thought that it would have been more, but it wasn't. I did get my period this week, so perhaps that had something to do with it. I had stepped on the scale on Tuesday and was down more than I was today (I'm still working on not weighing myself more than once a week). So, it was a bit disappointing. But... I've lost 6.6 pounds in four weeks. During that same time period, I could have gained 5-10 pounds (I've done that before), so I'm quite happy to be losing instead of gaining. I do have a bit of a challenge in the next couple of weeks with Halloween, but I'm going to do my very best to keep within my points allotment. No cheating for me this year. I have faith that I CAN do it! My plan is to send most of the candy into work with my husband. If it's not in the house, I won't eat it.

Do I need to change the way I eat?

So far, I'm doing really well with keeping track of my points and making sure that I eat only my allotted daily points. There have been days that I've gone a bit over, but I also get 35 weekly points to do with as I want. There are days that I still have quite a few points left over after dinner. I've been enjoying popcorn almost every night - a snack size bag of 94% fat free popcorn is only 2 points. But I've also been eating things that I know I probably shouldn't. Like mini moonpies (3 points) and little bags of mini m&m's (2 points). And I know that's the kind of food that got me where I am.

But I didn't get fat eating one moon pie. The "old" me would eat three or four of them in one day. Now, I'm eating one and being satisfied by it. Which is a good sign, I think.

There's part of me that knows I probably shouldn't be eating those things at all. I should stick to fruits and veggies and whole grains. I need to find a happy medium. Is it okay to eat things that I know are not good for me as long as I limit the quantities?. I know that I'll want those things so much more if they are not allowed. My thin friends eat junk food, I know that. They just know when to stop. That's something that I'm trying to learn for myself - I've never known when to stop. And that's a big thing that I'm working on.

New Workout pants

I've been needing to get some new workout pants. I usually wear my husband's old basketball short, but with it getting chilly, I needed some pants. I have leggings (which I hate to wear) - I wanted something comfy and a little more hip. I looked at my Kohl's and they didn't have much in big girl sizes.

I found these at Target. They were only $14.99 when I bought them. According to the Target web site, they're on sale this week for $9.99 - I need to try to find my receipt and get the price adjusted. $5 is a lot of money these days. They're super comfy and big. And they fit my short frame (they don't drag on the ground like some pants do).

Bunco Tonight

I'm going to play Bunco tonight with some friends. And along with Bunco... lots of food and wine. I'm going to try to keep control of myself, but it's so hard. This is one reason I made Fridays my weigh-in day. If I do get out of control on the weekend, I have the whole week to make up for it. And I took a very long walk this morning - one worth 6 activity points, so I do have a lot to work with.

Friday weigh-in

Some good news... I lost 1.4 pounds this week. With my gain last week, that puts me down 5.4 pounds since I started Weight Watchers three weeks ago. Not bad. My personal goal was to lose 10 pounds by Halloween. Not sure if I'll do that... perhaps by Veteran's Day.

One thing I love about autumn is apples. They are very inexpensive this time of year and around here, we have a bunch of apple orchards where you can go pick your own. We're thinking about doing that on Sunday. Anyway, apples are only 1 point on the WW scale - I've been eating at least one a day. They'd be even better in a pie or crisp... but I'll just stick to the apples for now. Although I'm sure I can find a WW friendly apple pie-like recipe. Anyone have one?

The past two years, I've bought Halloween shirts on clearance at Old Navy. Is it just me or are Old Navy clothes just not cut right for bigger girls? It's depressing. And when I bought them (in size XXL), I thought, "this will be way too small for me next year." Yeah right. Because I didn't do anything for the past two years to improve my weight, they're not too small. And even though they are big sized, they fit like crap. Damn. I need to find a big girl Halloween shirt, but where? I promise I'll freecycle it next year when it's way too big.

Background change

I'm using one of the templates that blogger provides. If you have a cute custom background site for your blog (one that's free!), I'd love to hear about it. I'm looking for a cuter background. Thanks!

Unfortunately, a gain

Friday is my official WW weigh in day. When I stepped on the scale today, I was up 1.2 pounds from last week. Not a huge gain, but a gain nonetheless. Not that I was surprised. I have a few things that I am going to work on this week to help make the scale go down... more walking and more fruits and veggies. I have not been doing very well with eating fruits and vegetables and that needs to change. That change will start today.

Wal-mart Underwear

Our trip to the beach last weekend was very last minute and when I packed, I just threw things into suitcases and hoped that I had everything that I needed. The morning after we got there, I realized that I forgot underwear. Granted, I spent a lot of time in my bathing suit, but underwear was a necessity. The beach didn't have too many stores, but they did have a Wal-mart.

Wal-mart didn't have a big selection, but at least they had some bigger sizes. I bought what I needed, brought it home and opened it up. The panties were huge. There's no way they were going to fit. And then I put them on and they fit just fine. How depressing.

So my goal by the end of the year is for this underwear to fall down when I put it on. And then I'll have to get rid of it. Good riddance.

I added the points up...

and I actually didn't cheat as much as I thought I did while at the beach. With Weight Watchers, you are allowed your daily allotment, but also allowed 35 weekly points. I tried hard to remember all I ate and drank at the beach and I still have a few weekly points left. That's good news.

Nothing like a vacation...

to sabatage the recent success of your diet. We returned yesterday from a long weekend at the beach. I tried the first day to track my points, but then didn't keep track of my points any more. I did semi-decent. I mean, I didn't go crazy and eat a whole pack of Oreos... I only had three. I had a few drinks (beer, wine, martinis... yum!) and those pack a whole lot of points. We had dessert (cobbler with ice cream). We had hushpuppies (with butter). I didn't walk as much as I should have. I took a couple of strolls up and down the beach and played with my kids in the pool, so I was a little active.

I was pleased today when I got on the scale and I weighed the same as I did when I weighed in last Wednesday. Although Friday is my "official" Weight Watchers scale day. And I know it's not right to weigh in all the time, but I have been stepping on the scale every day. So sue me.

Progress... finally!

I got on the scale this morning and got some good news. I was down 4 pounds, which equals 10 pounds total. Yay! Weight Watchers is working... now I just need to keep at it. It's great to see numbers on the scale (lower numbers!) that I haven't seen in quite a while. Four more pounds and I'll be the weight that I was about 2 years ago.

I hope that the number keeps going down. I hope that I can keep this up. There have been so many times that I start out well and then give up. I know that I need to lose the weight. I'm tired of being this way. I'm tired of looking this way. I'm tired of not being able to buy clothes in the "regular" department in a store. I'm tired of having a double chin. Most of all, I'm tired of not having enough energy - or desire - to live the life I should be living.